Review: Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi

THIS IS A SPOILER FREE REVIEW.

Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi (2017) - Rian Johnson

       Did you guys know there was a new Star Wars coming out? Folks, I had absolutely no idea. To be honest, I wasn't sure they were gonna keep making them, seeing as how they reached perfection with Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. Okay, ha ha I'm an asshole let's get serious. Here we are with the 2nd movie of the third trilogy of the illustrious Star Wars saga, a movie franchise that started long before I was born and will continue long after I'm dead. In the trailer of the movie (which I will outright give credit to for not giving away too many major plot points), Luke Skywalker, who is allowed to speak in this one, says something along the lines of "It's time for the Jedi to end." Well he says some variation of that about nine times more in the actual movie. In fact he kind of fucking belabors it. He does so, in fact, to the point where I actually absolutely agree with him. In a Star Wars movie that is well-made, exciting, fun, and definitely a step up from it's most recent predecessor, it really does make a fine point for the Force, the light side fighting the dark, being the worst parts of these movies.
       As we all know from the trailers (I swear I'm doing my best to give absolutely no concrete details about anything) and from the end of the last movie, Rey (Daisy Ridley) has finally found the elusive and long-missing Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill), who peaced the fuck out real hard after his nephew Ben Solo (Adam Driver) went all Anakin and started hanging out with a disgraced nuclear physicist (Snoke) he somehow met. As all evidence and logic suggests, Rey begins her Jedi training on his island with Luke as her reluctant (because of course) teacher. While it's fun to see Old Luke again, doing his daily routine and drinking alien nip-cum, we're pretty quickly just right back into the same old shtick that the first trilogy explored pretty well and that the second trilogy drove into the ground and made exhausting: Oh there's a light side? Oh there's a dark side, too? Oh and they're in constant struggle with each other? But maybe someone can be turned from the dark to the light? Or vice versa? Or vice-vice versa? No shit, we get it. We've gotten it for over eight movies now.

       Spare a pretty great opening battle scene, one that had actual stakes and character moments that were powerful even though they were from people we'd just met, the movie seems to take forever to get going, and it's because of the stuff on the Best Jedi Marigold Hotel Resort. Han Solo's crotchety grousing and mugging was one of my least favorite parts of The Force Awakens, and here we're subject to a lot of the same with crappy pants Luke, who even though we haven't seen in four movies, we have to catch up with by him saying "Go away," six times in two minutes. The first third of the movie feels simultaneously rushed and stalled at the same time.
       Elsewhere, the Rebellion--sorry--Resistance--sorry, who cares, are still doing Resistance-y things, namely trying to stay alive. This actually leads to an insterstellar kind of Mad Max: Fury Road speed through space with a few other worlds thrown in their for cool sci-fi measure, and it works. That is in no small part due to Po (Oscar Isaac), Finn (John Boyega), and Star Wars new-comer and MVP Rose Tico (Kelly Marie Tran), who get to have most of the movie's fun being glib, blowing shit up, and exploring the movie's most interesting worlds. They are the new blood to this trilogy and their importance to the overall success of the movie should not be understated.

       Carrie Fisher (RIP) gives another great turn as General Leia Organa, who is tough and possibly a little too old for this shit, but also never lets her compassion and hope come off as too schmaltzy or like lazy writing. Goddamn, she is the Sir Alec Guinness of this movie, and I sure do miss her. The movie has lots of other really great things going for it, including some pretty good turns from Laura Dern (swoon) and Benicio Del Toro (different kind of swoon, but still). The Last Jedi also offers a fairly diverse cast, giving men and women of color chances to actually say and do some things. Which, like, considering there are fucking space lizards and wookies all over the place should be a given, but hey, 2017 has been a fucked up time.
       Yes, the cinematography and direction are both pretty great. Rian Johnson definitely followed JJ Abrams' smart move of keeping the movie as grounded in practical effects as was possible. It has a grime that the original 70's trilogy basically had to have and that the 2000's trilogy completely erased with 100% green screen garbage. The past two films in this third trilogy have found a way to marry the two and this film in particular has some extremely striking sets and visual effects. The entire last act of The Last Jedi is actually all pretty incredible, which if you think about it, is surprising: This is one of the rare movies to actually stick the landing better than it did its first act. Which is not common, trust me.

Hiiiiiii Honey

       I think Rian Johnson did a good job taking the trilogy to a (at least slightly) new direction and freed itself from the exact narrative shackles of the original trilogy, something The Force Awakens seems to have almost vehemently refused to do, but it still feels far too similarly like every other Star Wars movie we've ever seen. And fuck, everyone, I love Star Wars. I really do. But if they're gonna keep pumping these out every other year (and that's just trilogy movies, lord knows we're gonna be getting a fucking Admiral Akbar origin story by 2025), they're going to have to find a new way to frame these stories. There's a part in the movie where a character literally says "Out with the old and in with the new," and Rian Johnson seems like he almost really wanted to do that. But then just kind of didn't. Those damn midichlorians, man, they're here to stay.

Grade: Probably a 200+ million opening weekend, because, in the end, that's all that truly matters. Oh yeah, that and porgs.